I finally got to see the new Star Trek film, although not in the iMAX. I think I was actually in a really good position to watch this film – I was never a great Star Trek fan as a child, but my brother loved it, so I’m very familiar with the characters. In other words, I’m the kind of fan who smiles as each character appears, knowing who they are immediately, and recognises references to canon like oft-parodied wheelchairs, but doesn’t get annoyed at things like Kirk not serving his time on a different ship, or get distracted by whether the owners of beagles ought to still be alive at this point in continuity. Good thing too, because I think that if I’d been more of a Trekkie, the screenwriter’s babbling in interviews about Quantum Mechanics, which he clearly doesn’t understand (I only know the most basic of basics, but I at least don’t take the Many Worlds Interpretation as somehow a well-supported, tested cornerstone of Quantum Theory as opposed to one of many interpretations) would likely have really rather annoyed me. As it is, I was able to smile at the familiar things from my childhood, made shinier, younger and rebooted with a new continuity, while barely pausing to wonder about how things had changed.

Star Trek tells the story of the first voyage of the USS Enterprise seen in The Original Series, and how its crew was first assembled. It focuses on the relationship between Kirk and Spock, how their chalk-and-cheese personalities can be reconciled in order to battle a Romulan threat to Vulcan, Earth and all Federation planets.

The film has been a remarkable success. The online fandom has increased hugely, with LiveJournal in particular flaring up with women who have become Trekkies because they were turned on by the new, young cast and want to write homoerotic fanfiction. The box office takings outstripped anything the old movies managed to generate, and finally, utterly bizarrely, Star Trek has become, almost paradoxically…quite cool.

With all this going for it, I thought I would love it. And much of it was pure pleasure. Kirk was more likeable when he’s too young and inexperienced to be that smug. Spock, although I did keep thinking of Sylar from Heroes, really couldn’t have been better-cast, and the quirky role was realised excellently. Chekhov was just hilarious, the right sort of believable comedy, and Sulu and Scotty worked fine in their roles. I was a little unsure about Uhura, who I felt needed a bit more of the original’s somewhat stiff dignity, although the scene in the elevator made sense to me: I loved how it seemed she was offering comfort, when really the one she was comforting was herself. Bones was well-cast and obviously studied DeForest Kelly’s mannerisms closely, but that was the trouble: it was obvious.

But I didn’t love it. I liked it. I enjoyed it, and would recommend it. But…I wouldn’t watch it again in the cinema. The problem was that there were just too many coincidences, too many shortcuts and pieces of lazy writing. So the exact person Kirk needs to meet just happens to be hanging out in an icy cave at just the right time? They happen to bump into each other not just on the same country, or even planet, but sector of the universe? And this character not only provides exposition but also compels to action and forces character development by providing a model to live up to? The time travel and sidestepping of totally accurate continuity by doing a reboot, that I don’t mind so much, but making just that become your thin, circular story?

Okay, it’s better than saving whales, but it’s no Wrath of Khan.